The rejection of Friendship

Throughout life at some point we would of all experienced it – the need and want of everyone to like us and be our friend. 

Whether at school or at work you try to be friends with everyone wanting to be accepted by all and liked by all. But sadly this doesn’t always go to plan. Another feeling alot of us would of experienced is the hurt and the sadness of one person not referring to us as a friend or being in their chosen list of best friends or left out of a chosen group. This is a hurtful feeling when you believed they were your friend and that you believed they liked you because you liked them.  I dont think they reject us as anything personal that is just how we choose to look at it and see it. 

So what is this need we have for everyone to like us and accept us?  Why do we try so hard to be accepted?  Surely not everyone can have people as good friends. We will all have our favourites. Usually mainly in school we will change our image and personality to fit in with the popular person hoping they like us and trying to be like them. But then that makes us look fake and ingenuine. How can we expect people to like us if we are not our true self? 

In my life I have had many friends but honestly only one or two close friends I can trust. Even though many were friends I still didn’t class them in my trusted circle. For example you quickly learn who your friends are during arguments and bickering when they use personal knowledge you told them in confidence against you. 

So perhaps when I have experienced that feeling of not being accepted by another I thought was my friend I stop and wonder – perhaps unknowingly I have inflicted this hurt onto another over years gone by also? Perhaps I have left someone out of an event or not mentioned them as my best friends not knowing they were listening or that it would hurt them. 

I believe we can learn alot from rejection. We can become stronger and emotionally wiser and more self aware. We can see our own faults and seek to improve them and make ourselves better people. We can identify closer and better friendships in the future and accept our own likes and dislikes. 

Afterall I suppose we cannot be friends with everyone for this just would not work. Perhaps the people who hurt us with the snub of our friendship doesn’t really matter anyway as would they of been your friend genuinely anyway?  Were you and them alike and share alot in common? Why do we get so defensive? 

For example recently a man in work is getting married and was inviting people from work etc but he didn’t invite me or one or two others. I didn’t mind as I am alot older now but once upon a time I would of dwelled on it. It was still in the back of my mind a little – why didn’t he invite me?  Does he not like me?  Am i not as good as the others?  But I didn’t care so much for why should I?  We are not best of friends we are more colleagues. We just work together. I haven’t known these people long I just come to work to do a job I already have my friends elsewhere who I value. But still the feeling of rejection hurts at all ages. 

So my personal opinion is for us to just be ourselves we shouldn’t need to please others and be accepted by them. We should be confident in who we are and enjoy being us. If people dont wish to be a close friend of ours then that doesn’t matter for we will find greater and closer friends elsewhere. Why waste our time trying to please others when others were maybe not worth pleasing at the end of the day. 

So just enjoy yourself and not worry too much about everyone being your friend. You cannot be the same as everyone and I dont think its good surely to have too many friends as you wont be able to dedicate your time to the special friendships. They are the important ones. The beautiful connections experience with kindred souls.  So just relax and be content with your true self and true friends will find you. 

The blink of an eye

Time goes by in the blink of an eye, 

dont think everything will always stay the same, 

you will only have yourself to blame, 

time just doesnt stand still, it moves quickly at its own will, 

Dont miss out on oppurtunity, make the most of what you see,

dont put off till tomorrow what can be done today, 

because before you know it that time and dream has gone away, 

life is short and sweet make the most of who we meet,

they wont always be here, so keep in touch with those who you value dear,

If you find love never let it go, the greatest feeling we can show,

for hindsight is a wonderful thing, as your love is loved by another being, happy once again in their new beginning,

make the most of chance while you can, 

for we all live and die and time passes by in the blink of an eye,

in the blink of an eye…

Love and happiness

In our lives we all seek and crave and desire that one thing – love. Everyone in all four corners of the world requires this from another human being at some point or another. I believe that love is the strongest most powerful of all human emotion. 

It is love that can save this world and overshadow hate and anger and sadness. Love can heal us when we are sad and lost in life. Love can guide us from darkness. 

Love has many forms unlike anything else. There are different kinds of love. There is the love of family and animals and objects and there is the deep attractive passionate love of another human which is at times the strongest of all. 

Love can bring us beautiful happiness and we must follow it and embrace it and let our souls be filled with it. Let it heal us! 

We must remember that in relationships we must never force love or seek it too hard because then perhaps true love will pass us by as we waste time on the wrong person. We must persue our happiness and what makes us happy. Why be content with someone and not really be happy? Why be with someone for routine or fear of being single? When it comes to love and happiness this is the only time we must be ruthless. If we have to hurt others (obviously let them down gently) to be happy and have love then we must. For in the long run it will be good for both of you. 

So many people have unhappy love and unhappy marriages and always arguing and sad and lost and stay together. But why? I think they stay together out of routine and fear of being single and uprooted. Whereas the true love for them is out there and it is never too late to find it. There is no shame in being single but always have faith as true love will find you. If we seek true love we wont ever find it as we will try too hard and waste too much time on wrong people but love will find us. You must always put your own happiness first and if your not happy then you must find the path of happiness again whatever the cost may be. Never forget the amazing feeling of love and happiness and the romance of love and the excitement and the attraction and needs of love and other another person you desire. Love is an amazing emotion so why be without it? We all deserve it! 

Why would you let someone stand in the way of your happiness? Why would you let someone prevent you from a love you want? Why would you want to stay attached to someone your not really happy with and have doubts? Dont waste this one life you have on the wrong person and live in a loveless situation. Find what you desire! Bring it into your world! Never stop until you find it! 

If someone makes your life more difficult and oppresses you and smothers you then they are basically not worth being with. Love should be where someone supports you and empowers you and makes your life better. 

If the passion and romance and connection has gone what is the point in carrying on together? We all need love and passion and romance and happiness so why be without it? Love is an amazing emotion to possess so cherish it and make sure you have it! 

So remember the course of true love is beautiful and never runs smoothly..buts its never as rough as a false love that you could be living…