A bayview window

Weymouth – a beautiful seaside resort based on the south coast of England. It has beautiful blue waters and lots of great sites to see. I went to Weymouth when I was 13 and today at the age of 32 – I returned. 

I remembered alot of it quite well. When I was 13 years old me and my family stayed in a house overlooking the harbour right on the busy pedestrian street with people passing by. It was one of the of amazing old houses I had ever stayed in. It had three floors and had big rooms. The ground floor was a sitting room with books in it and a chair to gaze outwards and was a relaxation room and the kitchen at the back of the house. The stairs divided the sitting room and kitchen. Out the back yard was this house I dont know how to describe it but I will say a building with a washing machine downstairs and upstairs two more beds. It was like a mini apartment. It excited me being there. It was a fascinating old house and the house gave me freedom to roam and enjoy being within its walls. It held magic within to me. 

On the first floor was the lounge with a bay window. Here was where you watched television and could see out over the amazing harbour. Every now and then the harbour bridge would open to allow bigger boats to pass. I used to love sitting in the bay window watching this take place. This was one of my most favourite exciting places and I could of sat there all day by choice especially when the sun shone. The warmth of sun and the exclusion of wind can be an immense feeling. I can still hear the bells ringing to alert people to the bridge opening and the sounds of boats passing up and down the harbour. At night you could see the bridge and town all lit up and I can remember the lights on the fishing boats as they headed up the harbour to the sea. 

This bayview window was one of my most favourite places to be. It enchanted me as the view was amazing and unique even though it only looked out over a harbour. I remember sitting there in the early morning watching the world and time pass me by on its way through life. The hustle and bustle of people walking and talking. The sounds of fishermen emptying containers from their boats and throwing ropes back and two from shore to boat finishing their mornings work. I was high up overlooking life. I must of sat there every morning for five days. The fresh scenary can be immense on the eyes and mind. In that bayview window I felt safe as I was higher than the rest of life. I felt unnoticed and protected there as I viewed the world. Had anyone else noticed the boy in the first floor window as they went about their daily rituals? 

The seaside has a magical feeling to it. The sounds and smells of sea water and sea food. The sounds of the seagulls and the waves not so far away. The English seaside has a magical feeling to it. Its a place which has its own unique beauty and atmosphere.  

Opposite the lounge was the room where I slept. For some strange reason it scared me sleeping there. I think its because I was young and slept alone on that floor as my brother and mum and dad slept on the top floor in the rooms above. It was also a very old house probably once belonging many moons ago to fishermen perhaps who would of lived in the local area for work. 

This was one of my most favourite holidays I have been on I can remember the smells and sounds and atmosphere. This also was probably one of the last holidays if not the last holiday we went on as a family before my brother joined the army.  Looking back it was a magical time and a time when I was care free with no worries or bills. Life was magical and a beautiful time. Sadly at the time no one realizes the magic of youth and freedom. 

Today I returned to the harbour 19 years later. I gazed up from the street below at the house and the bay view window where I once sat quite frequently all them years ago. All the memories came flowing back of being there. I began to wonder how many other childhoods had been played out in that house on holidays by the sea? How many people had sat in that bay window since I left over the last 19 years? Was it sentimental or hold the same memories to anyone else as it did to me? 
As I stood on the street I looked up at the window where once I sat and gazed outwards. Now I gazed upwards at the same bayview window from all them years ago. Time had passed by and now I was part of the view my 13 year old eyes had seen. 

Nothing much had changed of my memory of the place time had preserved the area well. I could remember it all well. Only I had had aged it seemed in the time that had passed along forward. Would Weymouth remain like this forever long after me and all the people on streets around me had gone and their lives passed by over the years. Do the strangers on the street remember Weymouth the same way I do? 

Memories are marvellous things especially when they are memories of youth and childhood. They are more priceless and remembered more fondly. This is one of my most favourite places I have ever been and sentimental place I have. 

Sadly with our lives so busy we seem to forget memories and moments and places as we are smothered in the present and dont find time to look back at past glorious days. But I wonder how many other people have memories they haven’t unlocked for many years? How many other people have tales to tell of such simple yet wonderful moments in their lives long since forgotten? I am sure many people have wonderful tales to tell of holidays and memories long ago. 
The memory is of 19 years ago and time shall pass by and keep counting the years. Where did all them years go and why so quick? But I was once there as a child and that fact shall remain forever and although time shall pass by and the years pass quick, I shall wonder whether anyone ever knew I had ever been there in that bayview window? perhaps not but perhaps when I die and if I get a chance to revisit the places I once loved…. From time to time I shall be found as a spirit in the bay view window….gazing out in my 13 year old form…

Here is for beautiful memories we all possess. May we treasure them forever for what they truly are…..Wonderful


A childhood home

For me walking into my nanas house as a child was like walking back in time. Into a bygone yesteryear.  There was ornaments and clocks and furniture from a time which pre-dated my life almost double. My nana lived in a traditional English house which most people lived in at the time. A two up,  two down terrace house. The front door stepped straight out onto the street and out the back was a nice yard.  

To me looking back to when I was a child my grandmother’s house was a magical place.  A place I spent alot of my childhood in the summer holidays when my nana used to take care of me and my brother when mum went to work.It holds sentimental value. I had never known my grandad he had died 8 years before I was born but I always felt like he was still there in some way.  

Now to me this house was peaceful and relaxing but it hadn’t always been like that. It was steeped deep in family history and my nan had lived there since she was roughly 18 with my grandad. 

Houses were not what they are now. Standards are not the same as now.  My nana used to have to battle mice and cockroaches reguarly as this was a common thing. This was the 1930s and standards were not so great.  There was an outside toilet. The whole idea of an outside toilet to me seems like a long way in history and madness as to how anyone could live like that!  But that was the times and the normal!  My mum once told me of how horrible it was going outside to the toilet in the middle of a cold bleak mid winters night. I am so lucky to live in such advanced times.  

World war two had broken out and my grandad had volunteered for the navy to help fight the nazi war machine.  This was a time of hardship not realized in most modern british minds and lives. My nan has been left at home alone to survive alone with a young daughter during the early years of the war.  I often remember her telling me of during some air raids she and my aunty as a very young girl possibly two or three years old would hide in the pantry under the stairs. This pantry was there throughout all the time I visited and to me it was a little area under my nans stairs with the entry into the pantry in the kitchen where she kept a few boxes of storage and a hoover.  But I bet alot of emotion was contained within that small space of time.  Emotions such as worry and anger and panic and sadness.  A place of a flickering candle in the black out and the sounds of bombs dropping and the sounds of the planes going over. Once a bomb landed close by and blew the windows outwards.  I cannot imagine all this happening within the walls I spent many a happy time and many nights staying over as a child. 

Over time as the years passed my nan had 9 children all born in the same front bedroom overlooking the street outside. Once I helped my uncle decorate the front room and there was remains of another time under the paper.  There was names on the wall and markings where my mum and her eight siblings had been doing a height chart with each name against their height carved into the wall. This was probably lost in time from the 1950s and 60s and once again shown itself in the mid 1990s.  Where had these times gone?  Time had flew by fast.  

Here is a family history steeped deep. Life’s had been played out here and events and situations and emotions had unfolded amongst so many different people.  There was happy times and there was sad times.  My nan suffered the loss of my grandad.  He died young especially by todays standards and was robbed of many happy years.  

But there was many happy christmas times as well.  As a young child myself my nana cooked for the whole family. For such a small house at least 30 of us managed to fit in on Christmas day to share Christmas dinner together.  How my nana in her 70s managed to Cook for that many people I will never know and at the time maybe never appreciated but looking back she has my full on respect for such an achievement year after year.

I cannot imagine 8 children all sleeping in one room.  My mum and her sisters all shared the front bedroom.  This was common for big families to do so at one time. Im not sure if today it is allowed I dont know but then it was normal. So many childhoods were spent here. Children and many grandchildren spent hours in the house and many slept over in the same front bedroom.  I always detected a presence in the front bedroom perhaps it was energies passed from many and memories and time showing itself. 

Sadly my nan passed away at the age of 98 and the house which had remained within my family for 80 years had to be sold.  Now its for a new family and a new beginning, era and time and I often wonder – do the new owners know the memories of so many different people which were within them four walls?  Did they know exactly how many people were born into the room they now possess as a quiet room in their home and exactly how many childhoods were spent there of people who have long since grown up? 

The aunty who my nana sat in the pantry as a young child also grew up and grew old into her 70s and has passed away. She had lived her whole life and she came and she went in the flicker of time. My nana had been born many years before her and outlived her oldest daughter by a further four or so years before nan died.  So now they are back together and I wonder if the shadows of time will replay and the echoes of them memories of them two in the pantry still linger? Them two together again in time.  

Perhaps them energies of that home and memories will linger within them walls forever and within the hearts of those who know how much the house in sentimental value it was really worth… 

Suffering of Children

In this world there are many children suffering and alone and lost in life without parents and love. They are passed around from carers and foster familys and have no real stability or love. There are many children who live in what we once called orphanages. 

Yet there are so many people out there who have the ability to look after these children and give these children the love they need and the childhood they deserve just like we had. We was so lucky to have a nice warm home and a bed and a family who love us to be brought up in a stable environment. But think of them poor children who are not. Them who have no love, no warmth of family and not experiencing the true magic of childhood. 

Why dont the rich do anything about it? Why cant them who have spare rooms and money give a child a home? Why is there such ignorance to the suffering of children? 

Is money so important to these people that they dont care for the welfare of the suffering? Do they not wish to give someone a nice life and a home? 

I believe there should be a government scheme which encourages people to help these children and to give them a room over their heads. A scheme which financially helps families to afford this and encourage it and give people incentive to take on children who need help. Afterall are children not the future?

Governments fund student accomodations and pay for people to have university students in their homes with funds but why not fund adoption? Therefore if families are being helped to provide then more children will be given homes with families and the target can be greater achieved. More children will have stable lives. It wont just be the richest who can help but everday families can help more if they are supported to do so. 

There are children who are orphans through war! There are Children who are not wanted and there are children who are orphaned by terrible tragedies. Surely we can somehow help these children! Surely there are people with money and room to help. 

People with so much money you dont know what to do with it why dont you help? Why dont you save children? Why dont you give them a chance? For surely there is no worse sight than the look of sadness in a childs eyes. 

I know its not easy for us all to do such a commitment and not affordable for us all and doesnt fit in with our everyday lifestyles but how many people also just cant help just because of ignorance? 

Life and mentality needs to change and adapt and find a way to help children have love and family and let them achieve their potential to be the best they can be. For are these children not the future? Are these children not the ones who will dominate the world and look after us when we are older? The youth is the future! 

May the day come when all children are raised in a loving environment!

May the day come when all children can experience magical childhood!

May the day come when mankind doesnt turn a blind eye to the suffering of the children of this world!

I pray for the day the world changes. For this day the world becomes smart..