Within darkness….

In life is everything we do and everything we work for pointless if we dont have someone to share it with?

Is it all meaningful and special without someone to experience it with us and to enjoy it with us and be proud in the eyes of others

One day who will appreciate our work and our time and effort if there is no one to remember us and who we was and what we did

Through having people with us and around us is this the best way to immortalise ourselves?

What becomes of the lonely? Those who give life their everything but without a special someone ended with nothing.

It can be so lonely in a room of people. Sometimes you feel so invisible and no one would notice if you left. Sometimes you feel you dont matter at all.

Sometimes it is hard to escape the darkness of our minds. When we get lost and search frantically for a light to lead us out into where we are free.

Sometimes we are our own worse enemies and greatest critics. Where we turn against ourselves and become negative.

Where the horrible words of others throughout our lives come back to haunt us and destroy our mind and happiness.

I sometimes feel like I am in deep water, I am going under the water often and struggling to return to the surface for air and I get air sometimes but I keep going back under and the fight continues to stay above the surface.

I search for my purpose and I often can never find it. I search for who I want to be but a battle of who I want to be and what I should be takes place.

Once the negative gets a grip on you it keeps coming back again and again and again and doesnt chose when or where it just happens.

A battle takes place between my positives and my negatives. But as if with life the positive vibes only come from me but the negatives often are said by others towards me over the years and this is heard again by me in their voice in my mind.

I gaze in the mirror and remember the cruel words of others. I sometimes hate the person staring back at me because of them words. Because of how they made me feel.

I compare myself to others and wonder why I am not like them. I envy others and face shame and embarrassment of myself.

I sometimes focus on my flaws. They become magnified and I begin to wish I had never been born

Then I sometimes feel so trapped in life and how people see me and things I have said and done wrong and my behaviour at times and how I feel out of place or with no place and I just wish I could end it all and leave this life

But it is these demons which motivate me on to achieve my dreams while I can and achieve all I can while I can.

Life for some can be so tough and our minds can be such a dark place to play.

I win many battles against my mind but I often wonder if one day – I will lose the war – but it is a war I shall be victorious….

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A Runcorn Ghost….

It was a late September night in 2018 when this event took place. It lasted only seconds but was very strange.

It was on Boston Avenue where it happened where I arrived at a house late on. It was now dark and about 11pm.

The street is quite often empty and you see little people around late at night despite its quite busy location of a daytime on a busy road.

I went to the house and then returned to get something out of the boot. As I approached the boot – the driveway was next to the public footpath next to the road outside the house. The boot faced parked on the drive towards the path and road.

This is when I seen coming towards me a young girl. It was dark and didnt take too much notice of her. But I knew it was a girl from her size roughly of a teenage girl with long hair. I remember she wore earphones and her face was shadowed out. She was about 7 foot away from me.

But apart from that I never looked or took any notice other than the quick glance at her as I turned to the boot with my back now to the road and the path. Because usually of a day or early evening you see dogwalkers and young people on the paths walking along.

I decided to wait until she passed until I opened the boot. I turned and looked around again quick – but there was absolutely nobody there. She had completely vanished….

I looked up and down the road but there was no girl….

She couldnt of gone into another house because her location was too close to me to go into someone elses drive and I would of seen her go down the drive as the fences are low between the houses. But there was absolutely no one about. She had simply dissapeared…

I can still remember it clearly as she came down the path towards me. I can see her shape and hair and length. I remember how the streetlamp lit up around her but her face and most of her front was shadowed out in darkness as Boston Avenue is quite a dark place anyway at night.

But what I do remember since this event which lasted about 5 seconds. From when I first seen her, turned my back and then turned back again and she had vanished – what I remember which I didnt notice at the time – is she had no footsteps.

She literally just came down the path, silently and dissapeared….

I dont know whether anyone else has ever witnessed anything in this area but to me it actually happened and was very strange as I know she couldnt of gone in another house or crossed the road or passed me out of sight within 5 seconds….

I would love to hear from others who have experienced anything strange…

The Others…

This is a true story of what happened to my nana in 2013 and the ghost which plagued her last few months.

Emily was a grand lady. She was 98 years old and had lived a long and happy life. She had 9 children, vast amounts of grandchildren and many great grandchildren. She had lived a long and beautiful life in a happy that she had lived in for 78 years. But all that was about to change….

It began one autumn morning when Emily sat to rest in a chair overlooking the whole living room. She sat and enjoyed the peace. But then she was disturbed…

According to my nana Emily a man entered the room and went into the living room and looked in the mirror….and a woman followed…. Dressed in all black wearing a black veil…. Like she had just been to a funeral…. And sat in my grandmother’s favourite chair… Her face in a fixed gaze… Motionless….

Who was these two strange people my grandmother had been witness to? Within a minute they faded away into thin air…..

The days passed by and there was no strange incidents until a few days later when Emily was sat in her chair in the living room she was watching television when she seen something out of the corner of her eye. She turned to look… Floating across the room towards Emily was – her mother.

Emilys mother had been dead at least 30 years and here she was as a young woman approaching my nana across the living room. Emily recognized the green dress she wore well… The phantom turned and headed through the hall door and vanished. My nana was so convinced she seen her that she stood up and went after her. Shouting her name in a friendly gentle manner as anyone would to their mother… But she was gone… Vanished….

Then events took a deeper and darker turn….

My nana (Emily) was sat in her chair when suddenly a boy appeared….smiling…. And being playful gazing at my nana. There was activity about suddenly of other people. A woman was looking around and a little dog was sniffing about the room as if he had always been there.

But then the atmosphere changed. According to my nana the boys face became fear and the woman dissapeared and a man entered and the child ran chased by the man and they all vanished….

These people then became an ongoing presence in my nana Emilys life.

My aunt Judy went to check on my nana due to these stories circulating amongst the members of the family. But she was nowhere to be found. My aunty searched the house and came lastly to a locked conservatory door… She opened in and there was Emily… Locked in. Emily claims the family locked her in and was looking her in there on the ‘mans’ orders.

What confused my aunty was how had my nana managed to lock herself in from the other side?

This man was an evil and aggressive presence. In the dead of night he was constantly shouting ‘put the light on’ aggressively to Emily leaving her with no sleep.

I went to visit my grandmother myself one day. I entered the hall and I could hear her talking to people. I went in and she was sat talking to someone on the couch. As soon as I entered it stopped and she talked to me instead normal as she always did and didn’t say a word to the person on the sofa. But as soon as I left to go the toilet…. I entered the hall and I heard her say ‘now where was we?… ‘ and the chat had begun again…. It hadn’t been forgotten about. This person hadn’t been forgotten about by my grandmother. It was almost as if they had waited patiently for me to leave…..sat on the sofa… Invisible and silent….

The next door neighbour to my nana Emily rang an aunty of mine that she could hear my nana Emily shouting one night through the wall so she went to investigate….

Emily claims that the boy had awoken my nana up asking for help from the man….then the man had appeared and a battle had begun between Emily and the man involving the boy….. Emily pulled on one arm of the boy and the man on the other…. A struggle took place…..Emily claims the man won and dragged the screaming boy ‘through the wall’. What concerned my aunty was… The carpet was all rucked up where Emilys feet had fought hard and dug deep against an opposing force…..

Things then got a little stranger…

Upon one of the men in my family going to visit Emily to see if she was OK he entered the kitchen… Here Emily had made three cups of tea… One for her, one for him and one for ‘the man’. He picked up the cup which was for ‘the man’ and poured it away down the sink. Then… He tells everyone convincingly…. The kitchen door slammed shut as if someone had slammed it in anger……

The man would often whisper at the end of the bed ‘we’re coming for you’ in a evil way.

I remember the last time I seen my grandmother. It was one Christmas eve. She stood at the bottom of the stairs agitated… Demanding the three people at the top come down at once…..

It was widely believed Emily had dimentia…. But these people… The man, the woman, the child and the dog were continuous up until she died…. The story and the characters and the appearances and descriptions of them never changed….

The future for you

I often look at you and think many things. Such as what will your life be like? What will you become? Will your life be filled with happiness and love? Who will you marry and will you be happy? What is written in the stars for you?

For you eras will end, dreams will end but new beginnings shall arise.

Challenges shall come and challenges shall be overcome. Each struggle shall bring you strength and wisdom.

I shall never forget the beautiful years of innocence I shared with you. How them eyes sparkled and how everything was wonder and how to me you are and was amazing.

These years have been some of the best years of my life and they will stay with me forever. You are as important as oxygen and light up my world like the sun.

I promise to always protect you and to die for you if I must. Afterall some things are so precious they are worth dying for.

When I am gone will you remember me fondly and wisely? May God grant me the honour of watching over you still.

May the world bless you with opportunity and greatness and wisdom. May you take all the chances you deserve.

Always remember to do whats right, so you won’t have to worry about consequences. May you always keep an inner peace which brings freedom.

May you grow to be old and grey. May you be surrounded by the love of many children and grandchildren.

May you find true love and may it last forever….

The life of Death

Why do we as humans fear death when death shall come anyway?

Imagine what we could learn and accomplish if we didn’t fear death or dying.

Death isn’t the end, death is perhaps only new beginnings. New eras unfolding just like the caterpillar.

Life is like a caterpillar, you must work hard and explore life no matter how slow or dangerous before you can gain your true wings of beauty like the butterfly

Life is what we make it, life can be cruel or life can be beautiful. Life can be hard or life can be easy.

No matter how hard we try death shall come for us so perhaps life and people should be enjoyed. Dying afterall is a part of life.

Many a great person has rose and fallen and gone to the heavens. No one escapes. No one stays here and survives to tell the tale forever.

Perhaps in the eyes of the living death is a cruel blow, but in the eyes of the dead perhaps death is a beautiful salvation.

Afterall perhaps there is beautiful granted peace and freedom within the heavens.

Perhaps death is beautiful to the dead and a great honour. Perhaps when we die we find a peace never felt before and are gifted with the view and witness of the lives of those we left behind.

Death as written in many scriptures is a beautiful paradise and a beautiful world. Death is a place where we can fear no hatred and evil. Death is a place where the soul can thrive.

In life and death there is angels and demons, and when we die the demon is left behind and the angels are born.

I shall not fear death because there are many great people in the heavens as there is on Earth. I am not alone in dying. Dying is my right and dying is the right of all people.

When people die in war I cannot understand this menace of others, afterall everyone we live with today in this world shall join us in the heavens in the next world in the same generation as in life. We shall walk together in the heavens

So the time shall come to die, and death and me shall go together onto new beginnings and life is only ever a gift. So life must be a gift of kindness that we enjoy and enjoy the people who are alive with us today. Because they too of all colours and creeds and nationalities face the same destiny as me.

May we have a beautiful walk to our destiny.

The uprising of minds

I shall rise up strong like the sun, I shall wander free and as peaceful as the moon

I shall fly graciously and majestically as the Eagle

Suffering shall only seek to strengthen me, Hurt shall only seek to educate me

Nothing that mankind makes shall destroy my health, mind and soul

All that which I worry about in the end doesn’t even matter.

I can be saved from troubles, I can save myself from all, I can be the greatest warrior of soul and strength

I shall uprise and be strong, I shall uprise and be smarter and better than what I was before.

I shall uprise with magnificent positivity and know what matters the most in life

I must do everything I can and be everything I can be, to be free from financial chains, first I must free myself and overcome myself and be better than what I was before.

Life isnt about what I am now, but what I shall become

When time gets tough, the mighty shall rise, the weakness of a mind shall be educated and people shall have experienced true life.

Life without suffering is no life lived.

Suffering shall always be hard, but what is the joy in life and reward if life was easy?

But let them say one day that I lived in a time of great struggle, but let it be known – that I lived in a time of great paradise and beauty

The end of Wars

The curse of all humanity and the shame of mankind which has plagued mans entire history is war. The most brutal disgusting act witnessed by all history.

How many more men will be sacrificed for the name and glory of kings and queens and politicians?

How many more pointless deaths will we have to face?

How many more fathers, sons, brothers and cousins will die in combat in a war which was not of their own?

There isn’t much more sadder than the thoughts of a dying soldier. Questions running through the mind of ‘why am I here? This isn’t my war and I want to go home’.

Sadly for these people it is too late. They have been brainwashed into believing in the notion of ‘patriotism’ and for a flag, figurehead and country and made to believe they should fight for it. But this isn’t a personal war for them and within the soldiers minute before death they shall realize it.

Will their ever be a day where kings and Queens and politicians fight their own battles and wars?

When will the day come when man doesn’t have to fall pointlessly for the name and glory of others?

Throughout history many great people with unique personalitys have risen and fell at the hands of war. But if they could be given a second chance to return to the world of the living I believe they would never return to war and seek peace tirelessly for the rest of their days.

Too many lives have been lost, to much blood has been spilt and the people fighting them dont know why they was fighting at the end of the day.

They are sent to their deaths and sacrificed for the glory of others. Others who dont care that they died.

The world fights feuds non stop throughout history. So much happens that the world forgets its own wrong doings and focuses just on one event. But the waters of vengeance run very deep. Both the west and the east is guilty of shameful acts. But now we must bring Amnesty and grow a glorious future of peace.

From the sunrise of mankind to the modern day we have fought each other. Yet the world hasn’t changed, people may say it is more civilized but it isn’t. Blood is still split tirelessly in the name of power perhaps now more brutally than ever.

As a man I walk down the street I will see no enemy. The only dislike that occurs is the dislike I am made to have by the media and the powers in this world. But me personally – I have no reason to dislike these people. They have caused me no harm and I possess no dislike of them.

True people seek peace, to live together as humanity. To make the most of everyday because life and people are unique and people should be allowed to live out the lives in the way that they want.

May the day come where the guns fall silent and the bombs no longer fall. May the day come where we have total worldwide Amnesty.